The WWE PG era, despite the increase in quality over the last month's worth of shows, maintains a bad reputation amongst online wrestling fans, in which one of the reasons is a multitude of skits, storylines, and matches that are so bad that you don't want anybody you know who isn't a fan to find out that you watch wrestling. These skits represent every negative stereotype of pro wrestling (stupid, fake, etc.), hence why they're listed.
10. Hornswoggle/McMahon Kiss My Ass Club- On February 4, 2008, the top of the hour segment featured Hornswoggle being entered into the Vince McMahon Kiss My Ass Club. This segment lasted almost 15 minutes with Mr. McMahon in the ring with his pants pulled down to reveal his pink underwear, and yelling at Hornswoggle to kiss his ass constantly. In the end, Hornswoggle BITES McMahon's ass, which results in Hornswoggle vs. Vince in a cage match for the next show. One of the worst segments in the McMahon illegitimate son storyline.
9. Hornswoggle is named Mr. McMahon's illegitimate son- The Vince McMahon illegitimate son storyline was the WWE's second attempt at a major storyline for the summer months in 2007. Their first attempt was "who blew up Vince's limo?" where Vince died storyline-wise, but was scrapped when the Benoit tragedy occurred. While this storyline on paper is pretty lame as it's the typical soap opera storyline, the original plan was for Mr. Kennedy to be the illegitimate son, which I was looking forward to as Kennedy had lots of momentum on Smackdown for several months, and even won the Money In The Bank briefcase, at Wrestlemania 23 before getting injured and losing the briefcase a month later (which I still don't get because the storyline was that he'd cash it in at Wrestlemania 24, which he returned WAY before). Then, his name was listed with a bunch of other wrestlers on a list of performers who purchased steroids from an online pharmacy, and was suspended for violating WWE's wellness policy as a result. For a storyline that was designed to boost a fresh talent to main event status, did they replace him with another wrestler with main event potential? Nope, Hornswoggle was named Vince's son on September 10, 2007. This resulted in months of lame comedy and the BIG payoff for this angle was Finlay (who was then revealed to be Hornswoggle's real father, making the whole thing pointless) vs. JBL at Wrestlemania 24. Nobody benefitted from this storyline at all.
8. McMahon/Kroenke confrontation- On May 25, 2009, Raw took place in the Staples Center. It was originally scheduled to be in the Pepsi Center but the Denver Nuggets had a home game in the Western Conference Finals against the Los Angeles Lakers, and obviously Vince McMahon had to book Raw in another building. To stick it to Stan Kroenke, he books Raw at the Staples Center, the home of the Lakers. In the opening segment, he had a confrontation with "Stan Kroenke", the first of two parody celebrity appearances (Jack Nicholson being the other). In the segment, Vince humiliates "Kroenke" after noticing that his middle initial was "E", which stood for "enis", which of course rhymed with "penis". Yeah. And in the main event, he booked the "Lakers" vs. "Nuggets" in a 5 on 5 tag match main event (Lakers were babyfaces while the Nuggets were heels), with the wrestlers on each "team" wearing the team jersey with their ring names on the back. Unsurprisingly, the "Lakers" won. Vince put in so much effort to make Stan Kroenke look bad but ended up coming off completely childish with all the juvenile jokes and booking the "Nuggets" to lose in the main event. All of this when the Extreme Rules PPV was only two weeks away, yet there was little to no build for it because of Vince's need for revenge. This should have been the worst, but there are SO many skits on this list that feature plots that shouldn't even be on live TV!
7. Tiger gets chased on Raw with a golf club- No, not the actual Tiger Woods, but a guy in a tiger suit, who got chased by a random girl with a golf club in her hand, and tiger growls played on the speakers when the tiger was chased in the ring during the opening segment. If this was WWE's attempt at being clever, they failed badly here.
6. Little People's Court- I'm sure you're a bit surprised that this isn't being ranked higher (or lower) but there are actually worse skits than this. On December 21, 2009, HHH and HBK are sent to "Little People's Court" for refusing to let Hornswoggle join DX. "Little People's Court" took place UNDER THE RING, which is depicted as a place where midgets live. None of the midgets speak English there, and Hornswoggle was actually the judge. No verdict was made but HHH and HBK get chased out by a swarm of midgets. Later on in the show, in the main event, Hornswoggle becomes the new mascot for DX.
5. Hornswoggle vs. Chavo Guerrero Bullrope Match- On August 31, 2009, Raw guest host Dusty Rhodes continues the infamous Hornswoggle/Chavo series by booking them in a bullrope match. However, Chavo had to dress up in a cow outfit for the match, with a cow head on, which caused him to not be able to see throughout the match, making him very clumsy throughout. Anyway, their usual match with Hornswoggle winning. The less said about this, the better.
4. Hornswoggle vs. Chavo Guerrero Tuxedo AKA Sharp Dressed Man Match- On July 20, 2009, Raw guest hosts ZZ Top continued the infamous Hornswoggle/Chavo Guerrero series by booking them in a tuxedo match called a Sharp Dressed Man match, a play off of one of their biggest hits. If the concept of the match itself wasn't stupid enough, when Chavo comes out, his pant legs are sewed down to his ankles so he'd waddle like a penguin. As for the match, it was their typical match with Hornswoggle winning by stripping Chavo to his boxers. I have no idea what the point of this series was unless it was to make sure nobody took Chavo seriously again, as it's pointless to give a midget a big push because nobody would take him seriously as a champion of any division.
3. The Jerry Springer Show- On February 15, 2010, Jerry Springer was the guest host of Raw. In the top of the hour segment, he has his own version of the Jerry Springer show in the ring. The storyline for this segment was that Kelly Kelly became pregnant with Chris Masters' baby, and Eve Torres, Chris Masters' manager at the time, got mad as a result and teased a catfight with Kelly, and also the Bella Twins came out so that Nikki could mention that Brie was a man. Yeah. And the end result? All the people in the segment played a practical joke on Jerry and that none of the things mentioned were true. That means that all the 20 minutes of stupidity in the segment served no purpose whatsoever.
2. Hornswoggle blows up Coach- The worst part about that this skit is that it was built up throughout the show. On October 15, 2007, Coach chases Hornswoggle backstage throughout the show, and they eventually make their way to the ring, when Hornswoggle hides under the ring. Coach looks under the ring for him, can't find him, but finds an explosive device. He uses it to try and blow up Hornswoggle, but it doesn't work. Coach goes under the ring to find out why it isn't working, and Hornswoggle comes out, and unsurprisingly, it works for him and Coach is blown up on live TV with VERY lame special effects added. Just because you're targeting kids, it doesn't mean it's okay to copy stuff from cartoons and expect it to work on live TV.
1. Hornswoggle goes through the wall- If you thought that Hornswoggle blowing up Coach under the ring was as bad as it got, well, you're wrong. In this skit on November 26, 2007, Carlito is bullying Hornswoggle backstage. Hornswoggle, cornered by Carlito, spray paints a hole in the wall. If that wasn't dumb enough, he actually goes through it successfully. Carlito, seeing how Hornswoggle got away, tries to go through the hole himself, but ends up hitting his head on the wall. Ron Simmons shows up afterwards to say "Damn!" while Carlito's in pain on the floor. Wrestling may be scripted, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea to write skits that only make sense in your typical Road Runner/Wile E. Coyote Looney Tunes sketch onto the show.
Any one of these nominations have a case for the number 1 spot, though it's very hard to top going through a spraypainted hole in the wall. Thankfully segments like these rarely happen at all anymore.
No comments:
Post a Comment